13 years ago my niece attempted to swallow a peppermint and it got stuck in her throat and she stopped breathing. I was outside and I heard my sister-in-law scream. I ran inside to see my sister-in-law on the phone with 911 and my niece on the floor gasping for air. Tears in her eyes as she reached for air as if it were tangible. My heart and thoughts went everywhere. I went to the floor with her and I tried my best to push her stomach and the top of her abdomen to get the candy to come back up... Nothing. I kept trying... Nothing. I was scared because what I thought would work didn't work at all. My mother was next to me. I looked at my mother, she was calm, but I'm sure she could see the fear and desperation in my eyes, and I told her, "I'm scared."
I wasn't able to continue like I wanted to, I wanted to give up and cry out with everyone else. My mother looked at me still and calm, and with a calm assuring voice, she said, "Keep going." I continued, although I was physically and mentally exhausted due to the fear of losing my niece. Finally, she began to cough and cry out. She was breathing! Thank The Lord, she was breathing!
That feeling, that anxiety, that desire to want to give up and just lay and cry out, that still appears now in my spiritual life with Jesus. Jesus' disciples are called to work out our salvation with fear and trembling, but there are times when I don't feel like working it out. There are times when I just want to give in to my anxieties and fears.
There are times when I feel like I'm not able to move, spiritually. But by God's Grace in making me a new creature in Christ, by allowing me to endure and to abide in Christ alone, I hear the Spirit by the Word and the people of God tell me, "Keep going." Praise God. For every Christian, God will make sure that you endure. If He has justified you through Christ, you will soon be glorified with Christ. Sanctification is a process. Keep fighting! Keep fighting! Keep Going! In Jesus. Amen.
Ephesians 1:13, 14